Story Engine 2010: Reportage!

See that? It's a photograph of this blog, on a big screen at The Story Engine, during a session about online technology. Furthermore, on the depicted blog, is a blog-post about The Story Engine.

Hear that? It's the sound of reality eating itself.

This week, writer/top gent Paul 'Twitchiker' Smith and I yapped on the Newcastle event's Digital Connections panel, which was hosted by ITV legend Malcolm Wright. For 45 minutes, we discussed how important it is for writers to embrace and utilise digital/online technology. It's a subject so large that we could have talked all afternoon, but thankfully for the audience we stuck to that time-limit.

It's an interesting topic for me. On the one hand, I love the opportunities, information, ease, communication, general functionality and downright cool stuff which the internet and technology bring us. On the other, I'm painfully aware that none of it is ever a substitute for great ideas, great stories and fingers which type until they bleed. Once upon a time, after all, writers had to make do with a typewriter, paper, the postal system and a telephone if they could afford to pay the bill. Even if technology progresses to such an extent that we can beam our pitches directly into the minds of producers, those ideas will never stop having to be bulletproof and brilliant.

As with last year's Story Engine in Darlington, the whole event was a wonderfully personal and personable affair. Story Engine mastermind Ian Fenton is a writer himself, and it shows. He knows what writers want to see, hear and ask, and is determined to give value for money, ensuring that no-one walks away with a question unanswered. It's a smoothly-run and professional event, with soul.

This year's guests included Black Books/Hyperdrive/Little Britain comedy writing duo Kev Cecil and Andy Riley (whose comprehensive Q&A session was an informative and fun look at their work process), New Tricks/Waterloo Road writer Lisa Holdsworth (a splendid lady who dependably speaks her mind), your friend and mine Danny Stack (who appeared on no less than three panels, strongly speaking up for the writer on more than one occasion - trust me, you owe this man a beer), local scripter Gavin Williams, Script Factory wizard and tremendous fellow Ludo Smolski, Smack The Pony/Green Wing writing duo Fay Rusling and Oriane Messina (funny and lovely, the pair of them) and BBC Writersroom founder Kate Rowland.

Throughout those two days, the sparkling Tyneside Cinema positively teemed with good people, including scripter Dean Lines who we can thank for the above brain-boggling photo. I had a blast and was sorry to leave not only the event, but such a beautiful city.

Before I did, though, I took a sneak preview at the town's imminent Doctor Who Exhibition. Thanks to the aforementioned Paul Smith and the Life Centre's events manager Andy Lloyd, I was able to step boldly beyond this here sign...

With two weeks to go, the exhibition was still under construction, but you could immediately see it's going to be immense. Plenty of fan-pleasing items and aliens were already in position, and the thing's huge: around 9000 square feet! Nice. Go see, when it opens on May 22 at the Life Centre.

The Story Engine: Update

Further to my last post, about next week's splendid Newcastle screenwriting event The Story Engine, I can now confirm that I'll be among the guests. I'll be quacking away in the Digital Showcase session about the importance of emerging technologies for writers. There are only about 10 tickets left on the Story Engine's site, so grab 'em fast if you want 'em... and see you there!

The Story Engine: This Time It's Newcastle

Now then, you... yes, you there, with the electronic quill. Listen up. Last February, I went to a tremendous screenwriting event in Darlington called The Story Engine. A smoothly-run conference with clear, demonstrable passion for the subject matter. You can read my blog-summary of it here and then a specific account of Robin Hood writer Lisa Holdsworth's pitch-doc masterclass here.

The Story Engine returns, next month, in lovely Newcastle on May 5 & 6. I'm certainly planning to help prop up the bar, as well as enjoying the various case studies, panel discussions, workshops and networking lunches. Divert your eyeballs towards the website here, for all the information your creative li'l heart desires.

The Story Engine: Lisa Holdsworth On Pitch Docs

Lisa Holdsworth knows what she’s talking about. Her TV writing career, which you can see in full on her agency-biog page here, kicked off with an episode of Fat Friends in 2002, then snowballed through the likes of Emmerdale, New Tricks, Blue Murder, Waterloo Road (for which she notably wrote the excellent book-ending instalments of the show’s recent Series Four) and Robin Hood (she has an episode on this very evening - 6.45pm on BBC One). She has a Twitter page here.

The Story Engine event (see general report in my previous post) saw the lovely, funny Lisa giving a top-notch class on pitch documents – those mysterious beasts which most screenwriters would appreciate being given a step-by-step guide to. So here it is: pitch-docs, the Holdsworth way.

“Sell the sizzle not the steak,” said Lisa in her opening, meaning that you’re pushing the core concept, not the minutiae. “You’re also selling yourself. You’re saying, ‘Look how exciting my writing can be. Look how original I am’.”

DON’T…

• … tell the story in minute detail. If you’ve written over two pages, you’re telling too much story.
• … tell us about every character. And try to avoid character clichés: the geeky-but-cool character, or the feisty single mum. Find something interesting and unusual about your characters.
• … tell us the intended TV slot.
• … tell us how it’ll be shot. “If you say it’ll be shot ‘a bit like The Wire’,” says Lisa, “That makes you sound a bit like an arse”.
• … tell us who you intend to cast… unless an actor is attached. Even imagining an actor can limit you, when writing the character.
• … include comparisons to existing characters or other dramas (although Lisa admits this is more her preference, noting, “Do what feels right for your project”.

DO…

• … communicate excitement. Too may pitch docs are too professional and dry. Without actually saying, “You’ll cry! You’ll laugh”, get that across. Be conversational.
• … explain why this needs to be brought to the screen, right now! Because that’s the first question someone like Channel 4 will ask you. Maybe you’ve got an idea for a period costume drama, but it says something about where we are now.
• … make us love/hate the main characters. Even if they’re flawed, are we going to really enjoy spending time with them?
• … tell us why people will watch your show. Here, Lisa added a related point: “If you don’t watch telly, I don’t know why you’re writing it”.
• … pack a punch. You want the reader to be exhausted by the end. Every paragraph needs to finish with “BANG!”. Not literally, of course.
• … leave them wanting more. This is difficult to do without being too obvious. You want to convey the sense that you’re just giving them a taste. Without actually saying it, you’re saying, “Bring me in for a meeting and you’ll get so much more”. Pitch docs tend not to tell them the end. Says Lisa: “I’ve never worked on a programme where the end didn’t change”. If you’re pitching a film, people need to know it rounds off quite well. Whereas, with a returning series, it’s best to leave it open. Americans are very good at making you wonder how they could do a second series of this.

THE STRUCTURE OF A PITCH (THE HOLDSWORTH WAY)

• A grabbing title. Heroes, Buffy, Demons (which was originally called The Last Van Helsing, until makers Shine realised that this title suggested a weight of history which wasn’t reflected by the execution). Firefly, reckons Lisa, was a great series with a terrible title.
• A logline to create intrigue. This is usually the last thing you put in.
• A summary paragraph that sells the central premise of the show. If your project is an adaptation then here’s the place to mention it, up front, noting that it’s about time this was brought to the screen.
• One-to-five pages of blistering prose that sets up the story, the main characters and the style/tone. Lisa usually writes three pages, then edits it down.
• A final paragraph that explains why this is the show your telly was made for. You’re basically saying, “If you buy this, you’re buying a fantastic piece of TV”. Take your self-deprecating hat off. Don’t be Simon Cowell, but say you believe in this.
• Write nothing about your credits or who you are – it detracts from the flow of the pitch. If you’re sending it ‘cold’, attach your CV as well.

CLOSING THOUGHTS FROM LISA:

• ”Remember – they’re always looking for a reason to say no. Don’t give them one. Don’t mention the scene in which a load of penguins get machine-gunned”.
• ”You won’t be held to the pitch doc, if you get to the next stage. People in the meeting will want to change aspects of it”.
• ”Once in meetings, pick your battles. Don’t argue over the colour of a secondary character’s socks. If someone’s suggestions piss you off, then go away, have a rant, have a cup of tea, then come back and think about it objectively”.
• ”Even if you end up writing seven drafts of a pilot script and it comes to nothing, your final draft will make a great calling card script”.

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The Story Engine: General Report

The Story Engine, held over two days at Darlington Arts Centre back in late February, was a tremendously enjoyable and worthwhile event. While smaller than the awesome Screenwriters’ Festival, it nevertheless makes an absolute virtue of its more modest scale, with relatively intimate workshop sessions, fine Q&As, speed-pitching sessions and an excellent line-up of writer-guests including Simon Beaufoy (Slumdog Millionaire, in picture to the left of organiser Ian Fenton, below), Lisa Holdsworth (Waterloo Road, New Tricks), James Moran (Doctor Who, Torchwood), David Lemon (Faintheart, Doctors), James Harris (self-starting comedy writer – see website), playwright David Edgar and film-maker Tina Gharavi (Ali In Wonderland, also a film-maker) plus the Writersroom North’s project manager Katherine Beacon, splendidly-named development consultant Ludo Smolski and many more.

Like the best writers’ events, The Story Engine offered plenty of opportunity to network, mingle and meet new people, as well as catch up with familiar faces (like Gavin Williams, Lara Greenway and Chris Parr). The Arts Centre is a really nice venue for an event like this, with plenty of rooms of differing sizes and, of course, the all-important bar. While being a tremendous laugh, of course, it also delivered a whole host of information. An info-buffet, if you will. Particularly evident throughout was organizer Ian’s passion and drive – as a writer himself, Ian has a lot to say, and an event for writers assembled by a writer can only be a good thing. You could tell that Ian was determined not to rest until each and every attendee had value-for-money spewing out of their ears.

TV's James Moran gave a splendid live audio commentary for his Torchwood episode Sleeper (see him in the midst of doing it, right, while engaging in a good old chin-stroke), as well as taking part in a whole slew of other sessions, including Working With An Agent, which also featured Curtis Brown's Amanda Davis, New Writing North director Claire Malcolm and Lisa Holdsworth). The Moranster ended up with vocal cords torn to shreds in a manner which only booze could rescue. During this event, our hotel bar saw the birth of the "unlaugh", which is a terrible intake of ghastly air, inspired by something deeply unamusing. Here's a delightful picture of me, Uncle Jimbo, the gorgeous Dan Turner and a bowl of salad on a shelf, which was vigorously tossed in three different ways, shortly after this snap was captured:


And for those of you understandably craving a look at that salad from a different angle, with bonus grinning bell-ends in the foreground:



Here's a simply divine photograph of David Lemon, who also got stuck into the event, appearing on various panels like New Horizons ("How is the internet changing the way we consume drama?") and My First Feature Film (about writing Faintheart, which was screened during the event, along with Slumdog Millionaire).

The Story Engine, then: a right royal blast. I fully suggest you attend the next one: I'll certainly be there. The next post, up soon, will be my one full report of a Story Engine workshop: Lisa Holdsworth's session on pitch documents. Tremendous!

Gentlemen, Start Your Story Engines

Been traveling around a lot lately, as I'm working for a new online drama production, based outside London. Blimey, there's a lot of online drama about, no? But I'm having real fun with this one, and think it'll go the distance.

I'm traveling again today, heading up north for The Story Engine, aka The Northern Screenwriters' Conference. If you're vaguely near the area and like a bit of screenwriting, then you simply must attend. Because if you don't, myself and event-speakers James Moran and David Lemon will pay you a visit and tickle your extremities until you perish from the sheer delight of it all. Could be messy.

Oscar-winning Slumdog Millionaire scribbler Simon Beaufoy is speaking at the event, which also features various workshops and of course networking ops. See you there. Or, at your place, for the ticklage.